10-03-22
All my male friends fail to figure out: how can a man manage to spend so much time and effort just to fake his romantic love to enter a woman’s heart for sake of money cheats. Even a bad man should act like a man. He may subvert rules in order to obtain unpermitted advantages such as inappropriate business deal. He may cheat on his boss which is an act of employment infidelity. He may temper with a system such as computer fraud. An ‘honourable’ crook has many options other than using his body to bully a fragile lady by elaborate deception. He has to date a woman that he does not like, then to cuddle her, kiss her and have sexual activity with her. Ugh! Disgusting men use love to cheat but it hurts tremendously when a woman comes to know the most heartbreaking truth that she was not loved and her body was sacrificed to her own detriment.
‘Romance scams’ take place when a criminal adopts a fake online identity to gain a victim’s affection and trust. The bad guy will use the sweet illusion of a romantic relationship to steal the heart of the victims. Some scammers may send gifts, propose marriage and make plans to meet in person. Eventually, the crook will do 3 things which a woman must watch out: ask you to lend money, invest in his business plan or disclose credit card and bank account details. Some even request you to have live camsex or take indecent photos that could later be used to extort money from you.
Hong Kong police told the public that in 2019, there were 594 romance scams but it rose to 905 in 2020 and reached 1,659 cases in 2021. Growth rate in Hong Kong has been 80%. The average loss per victim is about US$46,000.
There are many sad reasons behind a woman’s loneliness: inadequate emotional nourishment, not enough family support, too few meaningful social interactions, not enough work-life balance and poor physical or mental health.
Women in Hong Kong are stronger and particularly prone to loneliness. Many are too self-assuring and choosy. Over the past decades, the number of single women doubly increased. About one out of 7 women is single. Her first marriage is at the average age of 30-31. The divorce rate in Hong Kong is however as high as 48%. Many will re-join the club of singletons in a certain year.
The number of female university graduates becomes greater from 560,000 in 2011 to 820,000 in 2021, a jump of almost 50%. Now, there are more well-educated women than men, 820,000 women against 800,000 men, in our population of 7.4 million. In some sectors like public administration, education and medical profession, women often earn more money than men do.
The general percentage of women as C-suite executives is 24% in the world but it was reported for the big corporations in Hong Kong, it could be over 35%.
Singletons may be lonely but remember it is your life: if happy, stick to it and if not, change it! You should not be subject to other’s love donation. You can never date a man who asks you for money or financial support as simple as that!
Often, change is not so painful as one expects. It is the resistance to make a decision for change which is painful. The ‘Loss Aversion’ psychology is the reflection of a general bias in human mentality against ‘status quo’. When we think about change, it will become a challenge because we focus too much on what we might lose rather than on what we might gain by escaping from a situation.
Some friends who were shocked by love deceit and money loss went to the Police for help. The Police’s reply is usually like this: deceit as a criminal offence requires the element of dishonesty. When a man does not use false identity, provide false information or in any way lies, the police will be bound by the due process of law not to take action. Love deceit itself is not a crime. The only legal remedy for a victim may only be to commence civil court proceedings to demand repayment of the loan. She will have to bear lawyer costs from her own pocket.
One final question: why did the female victims believe what the bad man had done was out of love? Love is blind perhaps. It was said that there are two ways to be emotionally blind. One is to believe what is not true and the other is to refuse to believe what is true.
Hearts can break. They were in fact often meant to be brokenfor many many times. It is utterly in the aftermath of tragedy that you will compromise to accept the unappetizing Mr Right!
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